You ever just have one of those days where it just sucks. Yea, I bet you have. I know I have. Today is just one of those days, where nothing goes right. Since I got back from spending 2 week with my dad, and my boyfriend I've lapsed into... well I guess you could call it depression. I don't know. I quit smoking. And my boyfriend quit drinking. It was a fair deal. But he caved, and went and got drunk last night, and this afternoon. No surpise. I'm pretty let down really. He called and said that he would quit poppin pills except for x with me. And I'm not really in the mood to buy or sell, or eat for that matter anything that's gonna fuck me up. And if he can't quit drinking then I know for a fact that he won't be able to stop eating those colorful candies. I'm pretty let down. And I'm trying hard to not cave, and smoke. But it's hard, especially when most of the people you hang with smoke. My knee has been killing me since I got back. I think maybe there is fluid under my knee cap, but I really don't want to go to a doctor to get it looked at. Just too much work. And since I've gotten back, can you say drama drama drama. Good lord. I don't have any more classes till August and it feel like I'm back in school with all the fucking drama that's goin around. And what makes it worse, everyone runs to me with it, thinking I can give them the best advise possible. And I don't have the guts to say "Leave me the fuck alone." Typical. I'm a coward I know. And I'm trying to not complain too much, but I can't help it. I'm just trying to make myself feel better, and nothing really is seeming to work. I haven't been talkin to anyone about it, seeing as all my friends are in their own drama, or they just don't give a rats ass. I haven't slept in 2 days. I hardly eat. Someone talk to me, before I lose it. John is the only one that seems to listen any, but then again what can he really do. All he says is that he loves me, and even then I do feel somewhat better, but only for a little bit, and only because he's a sweetheart. Sometimes I think things would be easier if I just dated him, even if he lives a state away. I think it would be easier. But I guess I won't know for a while, seeing as I'm pretty wrapped up in the guy I'm with now, even if he did let me down. I'm sure in a few days I'll cave. A smoke sounds good right now. Especailly with all the stress I'm under. Maybe tomorrow will be better..... I just hope it will be.